


I'll Carry You Home (Tonight)

by kiriya



Series: Post-Series Xing Collection (Starring Greed) [3]
Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Gen, Greed is Alive, Post-Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-04
Updated: 2018-06-04
Packaged: 2019-05-17 23:40:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14841422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kiriya/pseuds/kiriya
Summary: Greed's tipsy. Lan Fan doesn't know what "fuck" means. They learn a little bit about each other.





	I'll Carry You Home (Tonight)

**Author's Note:**

> This work is a apart of series, please check the rest out!

Greed hardly remembers the last time he had sex.

The details of her face and the shape of her body get away from him. Still, he remembers dark hair and dark lipstick, and he remembers exchanging shallow flirtations in The Devil’s Nest after hours. 

Was she a bar patron or prostitute? He can’t recall. 

Dolcetto was there, ignoring their laughs and snickers while he wiped down the bar. Greed eventually dismissed him, and everything after that felt like a dream… 

That feels like a hundred years ago, which is more than hyperbole coming from a man with a bicentennial. 

During his second life, sex had gotten away from him, like a hobby that he had just became too busy for. Greed had talked a big game about Ling’s body being his, but it had always felt like a rental. Even though he had known no other way, _he knew._ He knew he was supposed to be older, even though he was brand new. When he fought, he knew he was used to being stronger, taller, and broader. He didn’t take the same pride he did in his first body. 

All that’s not even considering the loud, stubborn prince whipping up a storm in his soul, just waiting for a chance at the wheel.  

Getting in the mood was hard.  

But this third time around, sex is easy and familiar. Thinking about it makes him feel like he knows who he is. Like his old self. A hedonistic bastard who was all: want, take, have. 

The girl Greed meets at the bar is petite and speaks accented Amestrian. She has dark eyes and rich, full lips. She loves the deep baritone of his voice. She doesn’t ask a lot of questions, which is good because Greed doesn’t lie. 

He’s stumbling out of the bar with her on his hip, but is barricaded from leaving by a familiar 5’2” wall of all black. Lan Fan’s arms are crossed like a stern school teacher, and her face is impassive. She might as well still be wearing her mask. 

“Fucking hell.”

The girl - Greed doesn’t know her name — detaches from him. Her face scrunches up in disgust. 

“Is this your wife?” She asks accusingly. 

Greed frowns, and Lan Fan ignores her.

“He’s worried about you.”

The girl rolls her eyes, and walks away, muttering frustrations to herself in Xingese. 

“What are you two, my parents? Don’t you have anything better to do than fucking babysit me?” 

“Yes.” 

Greed huffs, because he knows she’s right. She’s the Chief of The Imperial Guard. She does have better things to do than drag his dumb ass home. He accepts he wasn’t going to stay at the bar much longer anyway, and grabs his coat. 

“Okay, let’s blow this joint,” Greed says as he throws his coat around his shoulders. It reminds him of his long black one from Amestris, but the fabric is thinner and the sleeves are bigger.

“Can you speak plainly?” Lan Fan implores. “Amestrian is not my first language.” 

“It means, ‘This place is lame. Let’s go.’” 

When they step outside into the cold night air, Greed shivers, even through his coat. The wind tousles Lan Fan’s short hair, but she seems unbothered by the chill. It’s the first time he’s ever seen her with her hair down. 

“Aren’t you cold?”

Lan Fan makes a noise that’s somewhat close to a laugh, then tells him something somewhat close to a joke, “The nights in the desert are cold... Will you need help walking?” 

“I’m not that fucked. Why’d you even come? Errands like this are beneath you.” 

“Nothing the Emperor asks of me is beneath me.” 

Greed takes a deep breath. Of course, he appreciates that Ling is worried about him, but this isn’t how he likes to be doted on. Greed hates feeling like a stupid teenager that snuck out at night; he’s been handling himself just fine for two hundred years. 

Lan Fan is not even an eighth of his age, but she feels like a scolding older sister. Greed can’t believe Ling sent a woman who outranks most of his Generals to fetch him like forgotten milk at four in the fucking morning. 

“Don’t you sleep?” He asks. 

“I’ve been trained not to need it.” 

Greed doesn’t reply, and she doesn’t expect one. He knows Lan Fan’s used to late nights and silence. 

He looks over her as they walk. She’s wearing her hair down instead of in a bun, and she’s wearing her all black civvies, instead of the decorated Imperial uniform. The dark ensemble reminds him when they first met in Amestris. Greed knew she was a force immediately. She’s like Martel, loyal, petite, and goddamn deadly.

Lan Fan’s not hard on eyes either, too. She has beautiful, thick glossy hair. Greed likes her round face and how easily flustered she is.  

Lan Fan’s cheeks start to turn a little pink when she notices him staring, and he smiles at how easy she is to crack. 

 “You know you’re a looker?” 

“What?”

“It means you’re easy on the eyes, sis.” 

She’s still flushed. “Why do you focus on such shallow things?” 

“It’s a part of my name sake.” 

She deflects, “Your breath reeks of booze.”  

There’s a pause. 

“Are we friends?”

“… If you’re trying to ask if we’re allies, the answer is yes.”

She’s being tactful with her answer.

Greed considers Lan Fan a part of the tentative family he has here, but he does not know what she thinks of him. Lan Fan wears a mask in every sense of the word. She always keeps her real thoughts to herself. Everything he says is met with a stiff, cordial reply. This is probably the longest conversation they’ve ever had, and he’s not even sober for it. 

“Can’t you indulge yourself and just give your real opinion of me? You’re not a fucking servant anymore. Do you realize you’re the most powerful woman in all of Xing? You have an army at your command, and one of the most powerful men in the known world wrapped around your little finger. He’d go to war for you if you asked. If I were you, I’d be fucking ruling this country.” 

Lan Fan’s face is a deep red now.

“You understand nothing, Greed,” Lan Fan says scathingly. “You seek power for power’s sake. You are naive.”

“Mind your elders, kid. I still have 180 years on you.” 

“No, I believe you have not seen suffering. People who seek power for its own sake have nearly destroyed this country. That mentality let innocent people in The Chang Clan, who have nothing to do with the feuds of their nobility, starve to death. Violence between the clans has left Xing’s people dislocated from their homes. This self-destruction is why our thinking and technology is behind still 50 years behind Amestris, Aerugo, and Creta.”

Greed doesn’t need to think about it. He knows she’s right. That reality was always the fallacy in his stubborn take-over-the-world plan. 

“I thought you loved this country,” he replies. 

“... The Emperor loves its people. Everyone is polite and giving. They fuss over him when he collapses on the street, not even knowing his status. But because of tradition, they suffer needlessly.” 

“I didn’t ask about the brat. I asked about you.”

“You would call your ruler a brat? You do not understand loyalty, Greed.”

“No ruler of mine, toots. I understand more than you think. Did he tell you about my life before?” 

“I assume that name is degrading,” Lan Fan replies. “Something happened that made you change your ways.” 

“Wrath killed all my friends, just like he offed your old man. I told them to leave me behind, but they stayed and fought, even though they stood no chance.” 

Lan Fan is silent again. 

“What?” He asks, irritated. He doesn’t like getting rebuffed, especially after making the laborious choice to discuss his feelings with her. Unlike the Elric Brothers, Greed doesn’t wear his tragic past like a badge that says ‘Don’t fuck with me’  everywhere he goes. 

“If someone was that loyal to you, then they saw something in you that was worthy enough to die for.” 

“What about you?” He asks. Lan Fan won’t even give her opinion on food, much less talk about her personal feelings. She’ll talk forever about Ling though. “What do you see in him?”

“When I was a girl, my parents were killed protecting the Yao family. They were not much older than I am now. I was angry, and didn’t understand. I was reluctant to fulfill my duty, even though my grandfather had come out of retirement to train me. I thought my parents died for no reason. I thought Xingese nobility had no problem letting peasants die for the sake of their petty disputes. But when I first met The Emperor, he told me his dream for the country — of changing things. I did not believe him. I thought the world was cruel, and that he was a fool who’d crumble under it. Until a man tried to kidnap me, and The Emperor saved me. He told the kidnapper who he was, and pretended I was his sister. The kidnapper thought The Imperial Guard would not investigate the disappearance of a servant girl. Even my grandfather would have thought I run away. The Emperor risked his life for me, even though the kidnapper could have easily just taken us both for ransom. But that’s when I knew everything he said was sincere. I knew he was someone worth protecting. That his dream was real, and that it was worth dying for. That this country needs him.” 

Greed thinks about Lab 5. He’d been trying out the lone wolf thing for a while, and it wasn’t panning out. He was gonna need some goons if he wanted to take over the world. 

(In retrospect, their power combined did not compare to his Ultimate Shield. He didn’t need them. He was just lonely.)

The chimera were in frail condition when he found them. They hardly looked like human beings, much less the tough crew he needed. He could see the contour of every bone through their skin, even the beefy Roa looked thin and starved. At first, they vomited everything he tried feeding them. Every move he made, made them jump in fear. Panic attacks, nightmares, and confused fits of violence were frequent. 

Greed helped them recover. Dolcetto once told him they made them feel like people again. That was what they saw.

In his hazed thoughts, Greed stumbles on on the uneven walkway. 

“Fuck.”

“... I’m still not quite sure what that means.” 

“It’s a sort of universal curse of frustration. It also means sex. Say it.” 

“I would never be that profane.” 

They arrive at the gates. The castle is huge, perched high in the center of the capitol city. It’s gorgeous at night. Xing still seems like a long dream sequence, everything is brighter and more colorful than it is in Amestris. The curved teal roofs and red columns and beams are illuminated in the saffron light. Everything here is more embellished too, carved into and painted on with intricate patterns of dragons, flowers, and history. He can feel warmth coming off of the glowing palace. It’s the exact kind of place Greed would have dreamed of living when he pictured himself sitting on a golden throne, draped in bitches and jewels. 

The guards bow to Lan Fan and let them pass. He can see the balcony of Lan Fan’s room from here, presiding over the courtyard where the Imperial Guards trains. He doesn’t think Lan Fan actually sleeps there, probably closer the Emperor. They take stairs east of the courtyard to his room. His room is in the wing for visiting diplomats from other clans, where Alphonse also stays. 

Greed’s breathing is a little heavier than usual.

“You are out of shape,” Lan Fan remarks when they reach the top of the stairs.

“Let’s see how you feel after coming back from the dead.”

“I am overseeing the training of new recruits tomorrow. Perhaps you should join.”

Greed smiles. “Haven’t had enough of me, huh?”

“I would treat you favorably. I’m indebted to you for saving The Emperor on The Promised Day.”

“No disrespect, sweetheart, but the bodyguard thing just isn’t my gig.” 

“Then what is?”

_If someone was that loyal to you, then they saw something in you that was worthy enough to die for._

“I’m hoping it’ll come to me.” 

“Second chances are rare, Greed. The Emperor brought you back, do not waste it,” Lan Fan says as they arrive at his door. 

“Sorry, I kinda already blew my load on saving the world.” 

Lan Fan needs to think about it for a moment. 

“… You are disgusting.” 

“I’m just saying. I did the hero thing already. Haven’t I earned a little respite?”

“Perhaps.”

“Good night, Greed,” she says in finality. 

“Goodnight, Lan Fan. 

It’s the first time Lan Fan’s heard him say her name.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry, I haven't updated this series in a long time. But your continuing kudos and comments have made me want to update!
> 
> Comments and constructive criticism are so appreciated. I have lot of ideas for this series, but I'm looking for a beta/someone to bounce ideas off of. If you love these characters as much as me, shoot me a pm!


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